Julian Alsop's Fables: Justice, JP and Kit Kats

Former Robins' striker Julian Alsop's weekly column:

WELCOME folks, I hope you are all well.

Hands up, readers, who has already been forced to put the central heating on before October?

Well, in my head, when the weather begins to turn is when the proper football season starts.

This is the time when the conditions sort out the nice players with their fancy hair and boots to the real players that will get you into title winning positions or play-off places.

So let the fun begin.

THE TRUTH IS OUT THERE AND A FEW MINDLESS IDIOTS CAN'T CHANGE THAT

THE big talking point in the game this week is that Manchester United have won more games at Anfield this season than Liverpool have!

Don’t get me wrong, I think the appointment of Brendan Rodgers as Liverpool manager is a fantastic one for the long term.

However, that programme on Channel 5, you know the behind-the-scenes one on Liverpool, was a little too staged for my liking.

Instead the documentary makers should get themselves down to my club, Coventry City, and have Ozzy Osbourne doing the narrative – that would be much more like it!

I don’t really want to get involved in all the hullabaloo over the actions of the minority of Liverpool and Manchester United fans after Sunday’s game and the Hillsborough tributes.

However, it’s worth a mention to praise the officials at Everton and Manchester United for their magnificent and touching tributes to the Hillsborough disaster this week.

I remember watching the tragedy unfold on my TV at home all those years ago, and I also remember what was being said at the time and in the days afterwards about the fans.

Well, all I can say now is that I am glad that the truth has finally come out...

Also hitting the headlines this week is John Terry, who has decided to retire from international football immediately before his FA charges were to be heard.

You will all have your own opinions of John Terry’s career, but surely the real low point was when he stripped off into his kit to get the Champions League trophy last year after not playing in the final.

HURT BY A WRAPPER? GIVE ME A BREAK

THIS week I have to a say a big ‘well done’ to the Echo’s Robins reporter Jon Palmer for some great witty banter on twitter.

During Saturday’s game someone asked JP whether York City’s ground was still known as the Kit Kat Crescent?

Quick as a flash, Jon replied to say that they were ‘taking a break’ from the sponsorship.

Clearly Jon has spent far too much time in my company to be coming up with a gag like that.

On the subject of chocolate-related humour, I had a text message from my old mate Kevin ‘Kelvin’ Slack this week.

Kelvin was asking if he was able to join the table tennis league that John Finnigan are now playing in.

Anyway, I asked Kelvin why he wasn’t playing football for Shortwood at the moment, and he replied that he had jarred his knee after slipping on a chocolate bar wrapper.

Now readers, and George Michael too, I will apologise in advance for this terrible pun, but I just had to say to Kelvin that it must have been the wrapper from a careless Wispa. Boom boom!